Unfortunately you really can’t do it all no matter how much you try. This is one of the biggest issues working parents face when trying to be an outstanding parent and employee. After I read the book “The Year of Yes: How to Dance It Out, Stand in the Sun and Be Your Own Person” by Shonda Rhimes, it helped me to understand that it’s ok not being able to do it all. If you want to get things done, you will need to get help at home — hiring a cleaning lady, a nanny, etc.
What I Learned From Reading the Book
The Year of Yes was an easy book to read (which I finished in a weekend) and I learned the following:
- Be a doer and not a dreamer.
- I love that she was honest about how she does it all. How she juggles work and family life. Apparently she doesn’t do it all. I love her honest answer of “Whenever you see me somewhere succeeding in one area of my life, that almost certainly means that I am failing in another area of my life.”
Reading this book was pivotal for me since I felt like it changed how I feel about working. It’s true that when I was working full time, I was successful at work but I felt like I wasn’t doing that great at home. Reading the book helped me realize that I shouldn’t have been so hard on myself. I wanted to be a superwoman mom and that’s just too much to ask. I may be able to sustain it for a few days but always ended up getting more exhausted as the week went on. I was out of balance and it sounds like it’s impossible to be balanced anyway especially as a full-time working parent unless you hire outside help or have family relatives help you at home (for babysitting, etc).
Since I’m an organized person and like a clean home, I couldn’t stand it when I got home because the house wasn’t up to my standards. I was cleaning and doing laundry past midnight. I couldn’t stop working until my home was clean. Eventually I ended up hiring a cleaning lady to help around the home.
There were a lot more lessons learned from this book, but the two bulleted points stood out the most in my mind. I’m glad I took the time to read this book because I learned a lot about myself.
Give Yourself A Break
If you are a full-time working parent, give yourself a break and don’t be so hard on yourself for trying to do it all at home and at work. Get some help if you are able to do so. And if you can’t get help, do what you can do (by prioritizing your tasks) and if your house is messy during the week so be it. If you can’t cook up a home cooked meal after work, order take out. You can work on cleaning up your home or cook elaborate meals when you have more free time like during the weekends. And make sure to not compare yourself to anyone who seems to be accomplishing a lot at home and at work. All you can be is yourself and do your BEST TODAY and be happy with that accomplishment. 🙂